The Game of Life

Growing up, whether it’s playing sports, board games, or computer games — we’ve all engaged in some form of gameplay to either decompress, disconnect, or just add variance to the more monotonous parts of our day. For many, playing video games offer a condensed alternative version of reality that is arguably more enjoyable than the real thing. But what if we decided to view our real lives through the lens of a video game? In this article, we’ll explore how personal development is strikingly similar to playing a video game and why adopting a growth mindset could be the simple reframe that helps us to both enjoy and level up in this game we call life.

Character Building

You’ve probably heard the term RPG, which stands for a role-playing game. In a video game, this usually entails having a character that starts off with a basic set of skills, and as you progress, you gain experience points (XP) that you can use to level up your character. And over time, each decision, action, and interaction adds to your XP. There are rules and instructions that govern the game, and you’re given a set of objectives, participate in challenges, and make choices that lead you down different paths along your adventure.

Now depending on the game, you may have the opportunity to choose from a set of characters who possess different character stats. These attributes tell you about the strengths and weaknesses of each character, like vitality (health), gold (resources), and superpowers (skills & abilities) that act as an instruction manual to help you decide on the character you want to be, and the journey you want to embark on. To me, this sounds an awful lot like real life.

Motivation for Gameplay

But if video games are comparable to reality, why are they so addictive? Well to put it simply, video games offer instant gratification and give you that sweet (sweet) dopamine hit, where your brain releases dopamine — that “feel-good” neurotransmitter that makes you want to keep playing. On top of this, you also experience:

- Community and Social Interaction: Many games offer multiplayer modes or online communities and provide a sense of belonging.

- Achievement and Mastery: As you play, you develop skills and overcome difficult obstacles that give you a sense of achievement.

- Escape and Stress Relief: By stepping out of everyday life, it can be a way to recharge and shift your mindset into a different state.

- Flow State and Cognitive Benefits: Gameplay can increase your brain’s neuroplasticity and gray matter, which enables different parts of your brain to communicate more effectively.

- Narrative and Emotional Engagement: With a compelling story, good games can be emotionally engaging, making you feel more invested in its process and outcome.

Video Games vs Reality

Video games are obviously a compelling proposition for many, evidenced by its multi-billion dollar industry. But it’s worth noting some key similarities and differences between video games and real life.

Similarities

- Challenges and Obstacles: In the same way you have challenges in a video game, in real life you must navigate and overcome difficulties and setbacks.

- Competition and Cooperation: Both involve elements of competition and cooperation, which teach us valuable lessons about resilience and teamwork.

- Leveling Up: In games, you level up your character, while in life, it’s the same thing. You can upgrade your skills, knowledge, and personal attributes to become a better version.

- Resource Constraints: Just like in games, real life resources such as time, money, and energy are limited, so managing them wisely is crucial.

Differences

- No Respawns or Do-Overs: Unlike games, real life doesn’t offer do-overs. Mistakes (big or small) have real consequences, making every decision more impactful.

- No “Save State”: You can pause a game (save state), but in real life, even when you hit pause, time just keeps moving because time waits for no one.

- Defined Goals and Multi-Variance: Games have clear objectives and quests. Real life is more complex, with multi-faceted goals that evolve over time.

- Tangible Reality: Video games, as immersive as they can be, are still distinguishable from reality (for now). Real life is more tangible, complex, and actions can have a ripple effect to the physical world.

In a nutshell, video games offer an immersive experience that is condensed into a shorter time frame. With lower stakes and more predictable outcomes, it gives you a sense of control and safety. And the more you play, the more invested you can become.

Choosing Your Own Adventure

Real life may not be nearly as animated and comfortable as a video game, but the reality is, it’s still your reality — and you have way more control over how you shape it. Like a video game manual, having greater self-awareness can serve as a guide for helping you to understand and maximize your character’s full potential. By reframing and training your mindset, you have the ability to gamify your life and give it the same level of focus and enthusiasm.

And as the main character of your own game, how will you choose to play it? Wherever you are along your personal development, you still have the opportunity to level up and choose your own adventure. There’s nothing like the real thing :)

If you enjoyed this article, please consider sharing it with someone else you think could benefit from it. Letter for Better was created to help you become more self-aware and and unlock your untapped potential. Through mindset training, I hope you can transform your life for the better!

Sincerely,

Dexter Lam

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Questions I get about this

Frequently asked questions.

What does it mean to see life as a game?

It's a reframe. In an RPG you start with basic skills, gain experience points, and level up your character through decisions, actions, and interactions. Real life works strikingly like that. Viewing your life through a game lens, paired with a growth mindset, helps you both enjoy the process and level up your real-life character.

Why are video games so addictive compared to real life?

Games offer instant gratification. Your brain releases dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitter, which makes you want to keep playing. Add community, a sense of achievement and mastery, escape from stress, flow states, and emotionally engaging stories, and you get a condensed version of reality with lower stakes and more predictable outcomes. Real life pays out slower.

What is gamification and can it improve my life?

Gamification means applying game mechanics, like objectives, challenges, and leveling up, to real life. It works because life already resembles a game: you upgrade skills, manage limited resources like time, money, and energy, and navigate obstacles along the way. Treating personal development as earning XP gives daily effort the same focus and enthusiasm as gameplay.

How is real life similar to a video game?

Both involve challenges and obstacles to overcome, plus competition and cooperation that teach resilience and teamwork. Both involve leveling up: in games it's your character, in life it's your skills, knowledge, and personal attributes. And both have resource constraints. Time, money, and energy are limited, so managing them wisely is crucial in either world.

How is real life different from a video game?

No respawns or do-overs: mistakes have real consequences. No save state: even when you hit pause, time keeps moving because time waits for no one. Games have clear objectives and quests; real life is more complex, with multi-faceted goals that evolve. And reality is tangible, where your actions ripple out into the physical world.

Can playing video games actually benefit your brain?

Some gameplay can increase your brain's neuroplasticity and gray matter, which enables different parts of your brain to communicate more effectively. Games can also produce flow states, stress relief, and a sense of belonging through online communities. The point isn't that games are bad; it's that the same engagement can be aimed at your real life.

What are character stats in real life?

In games, characters have attributes like vitality, gold, and superpowers that reveal strengths and weaknesses. In real life, your equivalents are health, resources, and your skills and abilities. Greater self-awareness works like the game manual: it helps you understand your own stats so you can play to your strengths and level up deliberately.

How do I level up in real life?

The same way a character earns XP: through decisions, actions, and interactions, accumulated over time. Upgrade your skills, knowledge, and personal attributes. Adopt a growth mindset so challenges become quests instead of threats. Wherever you are in your personal development, you still have the opportunity to level up and choose your own adventure.

What is a growth mindset and how does it relate to gamification?

A growth mindset is the belief that your abilities can be developed, the way a game character improves with experience points. It's the simple reframe at the heart of gamifying your life: setbacks become part of gameplay rather than proof you're failing. With that lens, you can give real life the same focus and enthusiasm as a game.

Why is being the main character of your own life important?

Because you have far more control over how you shape your reality than any game gives you. Real life may not be as animated or comfortable as a video game, but it's still your reality, and you get to choose your own adventure. The question worth sitting with: as the main character, how will you play it?